ONE LINERS ARE ALWAYS FUN

Guys Here are some nice one liners !! Enjoy :P





>1. I say no to alcohol, it just doesn't listen.

>2. A friend in need is a pest indeed.

>3. Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.

>4. Work is fine if it doesn't take too much of your time.

>5. When everything comes in your way you're in the wrong lane.

>6. The light at the end of the tunnel may be an incoming train.

>7. Born free, taxed to death.

>8. Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

>9. Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first.

>10. Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.

>11. If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on your pants.

>12. It's not hard to meet expenses, they are everywhere.


>13. I love being a writer... what I can't stand is the paperwork.

>14. A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.

>15. The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.

>16. The trouble with being punctual is that no one is there to appreciate it.

>17. In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?

>18. If you cannot change your mind, are you sure you have one?

>19. Beat the 5 O'clock rush, leave work at noon!

>20. If you can't convince them, confuse them.

>21. It's not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop at the end.

>22. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder!

>23. Hot glass looks same as cold glass. - Cunino's Law of Burnt Fingers

>24. The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker.

>25. Someday is not a day of the week.

>26. Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.

>27. To Err is human, to forgive is not a Company policy.

>28. The road to success.... Is always under construction.

>29. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again,neither does Milk.

>30. In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it.

And my favourite ...


>31. All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive, fattening or married to someone else.

woohoo!!